Minnesota Autism Mom

I just finished up a lovely dinner b-day party for the husband. Son woke up confused with odd people in his home and happy, but more confused when Grandma and Grandpa showed up too. It took awhile, but he eventually warmed to the company and luckily hubby kept him out of the kitchen so I could make dinner.

We decided for me to not take the position. The money was crap. The money would be fine, but working at a school is not 12 months worth of work…so I had to say no. Just not worth it with daycare and MA expenses going up. My goal is to find a job teaching art…nothing else, unless something exciting jumps out at me. It might mean we will be living on only my hubby’s money for a few months. My thoughts – oh well, I need to get back into my career…not take a huge step backwards for the sake of ANY job. Not yet at least, hopefully not ever.

Some articles I am reading…

Occupational Therapy for Autism

Connection between ASD and GI tract?

Daycare.com

Pivotal Response Treatment

My mind is spinning like a top. To work or not to work? Yes, that is the question. What are the long term/short term benefits? What are the pro’s and con’s? I have no idea where to send him in the afternoon. I am happy to say I just got a job offer. Of course, it was exactly at the same time I have my son’s PT walking thru the door. Hectic, hectic morning. Interviewing at a job, interviewing a daycare center… Is it realistic at all to think he would be ok at center? Is that just crazy? He really just needs a place to nap and play shortly while I work for a few hours. A part of me does not want to over think this. Another part of me thinks that is exactly what I need to do.

I guess this sort of feels like when I first had him. I remember he was shy of 3 months old and school was about to start again. I didn’t mind working, but I wasn’t sure about not being a SAHM. Even a stupid Oprah show talked about this topic. My head started to spin…what to do? Am I making the right decision? And then a young woman said that her mom worked and she is pretty sure she turned out just fine and would have been the same even if her mom would have stayed home. That’s when I thought about myself. My mom worked too. Were my successes and failures based on my mom’s 24 hour care? Um, no. I do not remember daycare. I do not remember babysitters.  I vaguely remember my grandma. These years are important, but they are not memorable if nothing traumatic happens.

So, my feelings of returning to work are feeling similar. Maybe pronounced because of his ASD, maybe not. It’s been a hellish 2009 and I just want 2010 to be better. A part of me is not ready to return to work and most likely has nothing to do with our child. I can admit that. I can admit that trying to find an ideal location for him to spend his hours in therapy and otherwise is making me absolutely koo-koo.

I also know that we will figure this out and it will be ok. No matter what the decision ends up being. So I will take a deep breath and just move forward with tomorrow.

I just finished reading “Autism’s False Prophets” and I would highly recommend reading it, even if you didn’t have a child w/ ASD. I believe everyone is bias and he clearly is a dr that sees his pt of view and is arguing it strongly and clearly.

Prior to having my son, I was told to consider spacing out vaccinations by co-workers (who happen to be teachers). Everyone said that they think vaccs are important, but also scary and shouldn’t be done all at once. The ASD scare was clear to me. I did the same. I did no research on the topic and was then was scared too by the amount of inoculations they wanted to put in my baby boy. I spaced them out. Did them when I wanted to and my son has autism today. I have no way to prove this, but I do not believe shots caused ASD in my child. I think he had a rough start and continues to be delayed today. Shots or no shots, I think my son would be the same.

So the first time I walked into the Autism Shop in Hopkins (the day after he was diagnosed), I was surprised and taken back by the woman in the store.  Her first question…”do you believe he has asd from shots?” Ummm…no, he didn’t have a traditional imm. schedule and blah, blah…Anyway, she dropped it. She moved on the GCFC diet.  She explained it wasn’t that hard to do and her daughter now goes to college..is cured or whatever. I was a little annoyed with her. I told her we just got the dx and were there to shop. She really wanted to discuss this and I felt overwhelmed by her need to educate me on the spot. She did this again the 2nd time Iwent in a few months later. I could not order certain products online, so I went to her store again. Same old crap and I couldn’t believe she was dying to bring this up again. I am not sure I will ever make a pt to go there again.

It seems like everyone is fearful of the all might shot these days. I see in newsletters put out by TACA, recommending to not give the flu shot or any other shot if your child has a dx of ASD. This makes being a parent very confusing. Is there weight to the argument that vaccinations cause ASD? Is it the mercury/thermisoal? I was tired of wondering and have started to read more deeply this week. Read online, read various books and after some serious thought, the most believable conclusion is of Dr Offit’s book. There is no proof mercury causes ASD. None. And Dr Wakefield’s conclusion that MMR/bowel issues are related to ASD has been all over the news lately…again and again disproving his theories. He was too quick to have found a cure and I see the media pointing this out today, but clearly the damage is done. How many people are not vaccinating today because of him? It’s going to take a long time to counter what has happened since the 90’s.

Anyway, I am going to try to conclude now (as I would rather be napping!!). I am not a huge fan of biomedical approaches. I am concerned about the desire to do anything and everything for a child. I worry about the emotional issues of proving you are a good parent by doing everything. I really liked Dr Offit’s comparison to polio. As he reflects on the desperate measures (and sometimes fatal) to cure a child of polio…we can easily see how history is repeating itself. It happens in all medical disorders that are not currently curable. Do you remember the cure for MS using bees?

I am skeptical of the GCFC diet, I think chelation is a horrible idea, and I most definitely do not think people should be scared of big “pharm”, but always cautious of well-intended, but uninformed individuals. In fact, that is a good way to wrap this up. There are A LOT of well-intended, but uneducated people. I am going to be extremely skeptical of the ASD cure until there is some serious evidence over a period of time. I am not going to let my baby be someone’s guinea pig. My new research topic…allergies/ASD/ and the GCFC diet. Where did all of this come from? Any recommendations on where to start?

Science Friday’s